Patient...am I?

Putting Baby Garreth to sleep at times can be a challenge. He can be really tired sometime but after cuddling him in our arms or patting him on the butt in the playpen for coming to 30 to 45mins, he still refuses to close his eyes and go to dreamland.

On good days, he can drift into deep sleep pretty soon, like 10-15mins of patting, but on bad days, how hard you have tried, he still open his go-lee (marble) eyes and stare at you blankly though he keeps on yawning hard. I don't mind the 10-15mins of patting, as long as it helps to get him into a couple of hours of sleep, but longer than that, usually will drive me nuts. The time spent patting and coaxing him to sleep actually eats up the time I need to do other stuff like housework, bathing, or even resting, and it kinda made me lose my patience on the little one. There was even an incident where I nearly wanted to tear my hair and raise my voice at the boy after trying to put him to sleep for nearly an hour!

I want to clarify that this is not my usual self as normally my patience tolerance level is quite high. Hubby Goh also noticed this change in me and whenever he sees me getting pek chek cos' Baby Garreth refuses to sleep, he will take over the job and manages to put him to sleep successfully. All the while, I thought that I'm patient, but am seriously wrong cos' Hubby Goh is still the ultimate winner. How bad Baby Garreth has fusses, Hubby Goh do have the patience to calm and coax him down and eventually put him to sleep. Feel so guilty on why I'm behaving this way now. Is it becos' of the hormones changing? Is it that I'm too confined at home that I feel pissed? Or is it lack of sleep and rest? Sigh..I really dunno...and I hope Baby Garreth will not hate me.

Anyway, had a good talk with Hubby Goh today and he encouraged me to be mentally strong. One trick he shared was whenever we are trying to put our boy to sleep, juz keep on reminding ourselves that we must be PATIENT, PATIENT, PATIENT...he's only an innocent baby and it's useless getting pissed at him cos' he will never know what is right or wrong at this young age.

Hmm..guess I have to work on that..I dun wanna be a bad mummy :(

Penny For Thoughts

It has been a fulfilling 2 weeks spending quality time with Baby Garreth with Hubby Goh together. It was not easy, but I'm proud to say that we have achieved much without the help of anyone, just ourselves. It's kind of a shock that the CL we have hired, having spent nearly a month of her time with our baby, doesn't seem to be able to identify his wants and needs till the last day of her service. Two weeks was all we need to understand our boy and now he's a little contented baby, although at some point of times he still throw his occasional tantrums, refusing to sleep and pisses us off. But there again, we told ourselves, he's just a baby and it's a passing phase, this is all temporary and things can only get better the next day :)

List of stuff I have learnt so far:

1. Differentiate Garreth's various cries. Most of the time, he just wail for milk, otherwise it will be he is sleepy and needs some cuddles or pat on the butt to go into deep sleep or he poos or pees.

2. Bathing him is a breeze now. Back then when the CL bathes him, he doesn't like it and will always cry, but with my magic hands, Garreth boy now not only enjoys his bath, he will also smile when I lay him on the changing table after his daily bath.

3. Our baby likes to suck for comfort before he sleeps. In order not to let him cry too much, we have succumbed to the evil of giving him the pacifier. It doesn't feel good seeing him sucking the ugly piece of thing in his mouth, but the amazing part was the pacifier do really helps to get him into deep sleep faster and easily. The hindside is that Baby Garreth doesn't suck long on it, usually he will spit it out when he is about to go into deep sleep...which is good!

4. We have kinda established a daily routine for Garreth. If he is fed on breastmilk, he tends to get hungry after 2hrs, sometimes even 1.5hrs. But with formula, usually is 3 hours, on good nights, he could hold his hunger for even 4 hours. Of cos, it will be great if he can sleep through the night after his last feed at 11pm, but well, I guess I shouldn't be asking for more if he allows me to have at least 5-6 hours of sleep every night. And yes, I think I will stop expressing my milk for him soon cos' my supply has decreased due to lack of sleep, time and nutritious food. Not that I'm selfish, but coping with all the housework (washing laundry, sterilising milk bottles, etc) and taking care of Baby Garreth's needs alone, is really stressful and it has so far taken away my "ME" time, don't really have the time to do the things I really want (like going to Mango Sale!!). But I'm not complaining, what is this little sacrifice as compared to having a cute little son like Garreth..hehe..

Feel kinda sad cos' Hubby Goh will be returning back to work tomorrow and it's all home alone for me and baby. Though my mum said that she will hop over to helpout, but still, I don't expect her to take over the CL role and there are still things which I have to manage myself and not depend on her. Well, whatever it is, I will try my best and give the best to my little prince.

Oh yah, already bought a digital weighing scale the other day at Best Denki. Just weighed the boy yesterday and he has already passed the 5kg mark! Wa lau eh...

FREEDOM!

The "confined" days are finally gone and things are back to normal with just the two of us, plus the little one, of cos!

As expected, the CL woke up extraordinarily early on Friday morning and prepared all the necessary stuff for me and the baby. By 9.30am, she was all ready to go and we bid her goodbye and welcomed the freedom we have longed for after this miserable one month.

Taking care of Garreth boy during the day was ok (without the CL around), but the night shift turned out to be a total nightmare for our virgin night with Garreth. He was a little cranky in the beginning, so Hubby Goh carried and patted him to sleep, when he finally zonked off, it was time for his 1st night feed and started to yell for milk. When he finished his milk and we settled him back to his bed, he pooed the very next hour and I had to wake up and clean him up. When he's finally cleaned, his next feed was due and the cycle went on and on again the entire night. I only managed to catch an hour's sleep and was totally worn off the next morning.

I dreaded the full month party, not only I was tired, Baby Garreth was affected by the sudden surge of visitors in the house and started to act cranky and couldn't get into deep sleep. We hid in the room most of the time as I didn't want the visitors to pass Garreth around like a passing baton and frighten him. I was practically counting down the time for the party to end so that I can free myself with all the entertainment and collapse in the bed. I knew I was a poor host yesterday but really, entertaining with half a mind gone is really not a joke. I just like to apologise to my visitors for my poor hospitality yesterday and at the same time thank them for their presence and lovely gifts and well wishes. I appreciate that they still show up even for the bad weather, some having to lug their babies, kids and maids along too. Thank you people, you're the best and I hope to catch up with you again real soon!

Now waiting for Baby Garreth's next feed before we hit the bed....aye...baby baby...

Counting Down

The confinement is coming to an end soon and I just can't wait! This evening, am going to sneak out of the house to attend the company's Dinner & Dance, much to the delight of my colleagues. I guess they all missed me but I think I will just go and show face and come back early cos' I might miss Garreth too much..haha..

Tonight, the theme is Hollywood and we are all expected to dress up in gowns or dresses. I took a peep at the wardrobe and panicked cos' I couldn't find anything suitable. Lucky there's this beige dress I bought before I got preggy, it was intend for this year's CNY, but cos' it looked kinda overly-glam, so I hung it back to the wardrobe and settled for something else instead. And when I finally wanted to wear it, too late...am preggy and can't squeeze in liao!

Have yet to announce the good news that my dearest sis juz got preggy! And it might be a BOY! Woohoo! Whether or not it's a boy, she's guaranteed a $15K from her MIL....so lucky right? Next time shall check if she wants a god grandson, I don't need $15K lah...$10K is good enough..haha..

Confinement Lady Woes

Don't mean to condemn all the Confinement Ladies (CLs) out there but I truly had bad experience with them this very first time. Call them hoax or liars, if they really had the 20 to 30 years of relevant working experience, why do we still face problems with them? Shouldn't they be some experts right now and know every tiny whiny details about baby and confinement by juz a snap of the fingers?

I have 101 reasons why these CLs are such a pain in the ass and why we shouldn't be hiring them:
1. The original CL I've hired was booked 6 months in advance with the recommendation of a gf. Although reminder calls were given to her on my assignment, she still agreed to take up 1 assignment prior to mine, which was only 2 weeks apart from my edd. Shouldn't they know that we don't pop on the exact day of our edd? So as expected, I popped 11 days earlier and she couldn't make it to S'pore on time cos' she couldn't clear the Singapore customs. She then referred this agency to me who turned out to be a total nightmare!

2. The agency got me this CL. She didn't quite really make it on the first impression, but I told myself not to stereotype. One the first day of work, she demanded my parents to buy this, buy that and commented that my kitchen is not well furnished. Subsequently she made a whole mess of my kitchen, staining my stove, spoiling my kitchen top, dirty my common toilet, everywhere was like a war zone and I was totally stressed up with her working style!

3. Not only was that CL messy, she was also unhygenic. I looked in horror when she was washing my cup with detergent in the basin where she placed a piece of raw pork thawing there! I told her off that she shouldn't do that, but she replied that she will wash the meat again before she cooks. WTF?!?

4. Besides about cooking and washing, she didn't handle my boy well too. Garreth boy was developing heat rashes around the neck for a couple of days already and all she did was to apply the DIAPER rash cream on his neck and keep proclaiming that the cream do magic and the rashes will be gone soon! They never did and there were more instead, so much so that the rashes started to spread to the bottom of his head too!

5. She was argumentative too. Told her to cook with care (cos' she has burnt all the whatever pots and pans I have in the cupboard!) but she insisted that cooking is like that, the stove will more or less be stained. I know it will be stained, but the problem was she doesn't bother to wipe clean, leaving all the oil spurts and food stains overnight. Usually I was the one who sneaked out of the bedroom to clean up her mess and got nagged by Hubby Goh instead.

6. I don't know why she is so dirty and messy but still she made a point to stay clean herself. Within a day, she can change 2-3 sets of clothings at home. The bedsheet which I have changed for her before she came, she demanded that she wants a new set of bedsheet to be changed only after 9 days of work! I refused to budge, but she was smart to remove the bedsheet and placed them in the laundry basket that I can't do anything but to dig out the spare bedsheet for her! I nearly commit murder, I tell you!

7. The last and final straw was when she requested my mum to buy more poultry and seafood to cook for me when my checked the fridge and realised that those which she has bought for me were not cooked and has turned bad and gave out foul smell. Those stuff actually cost my mum about $50 and it was wasted like that juz because of her muddle-headness!! Enough is enough, I picked up the phone the next morning, complaint to the agent and demanded for an immediate replacement!

8. The new one came after 2 days. She's slightly better but I wouldn't say she's good. Well at least she keeps the house clean by cleaning the floor everyday and tidied my kitchen after that terror CL left. But this one is a bad cook, doesn't bother to cook breakfast for me, leaving me to eat bread or instant cereals everyday. Her porridge sucks too, plain and no ingredients (although there are plenty of meat and fish in the freezer!), and let's not talk about the overcooked broccoli for dinner and the saltish chicken with overdose of black soy sauce. Yucks.

9. This auntie is defensive as well. When you try to explain and rectify her, she will say that it's not her fault. My point is not to scold her for the problems she has caused, but to enlighten her so that she will do it right the next time. But no, she don't see it and still do her own her way.

10. Not sure if being talkative links directly with age? This one can repeat her stories over and over again everyday, like a spoilt radio. She tells my parents story one, she can repeat it to my in-laws the next day, and then to my sis, my hubby and so on... Come on..I need peace during my confinement, besides baby's cries, I dun wish to hear any other blabberings!! Keep those to your family and friends when you're back home ok, auntie?

11. Somehow when the baby coos and cries, this auntie will shove the milk bottle to him to keep him quiet. Doesn't she know that she should check if the diaper is wet or if baby Garreth has pooed? No wonder the new can of milk powder is gone only after a week!! And that's only for night feeds ok?!? She better not waste them, else I'm gona cut her salary! Hmpf!!

Sigh! Feel so much better after venting about all these CLs. I've learnt my lesson and if there will be the 2nd time again (not so soon I hope!), will better do some research and findings before hiring one. Cos they not only stressed me and Hubby Goh out, they also caused headaches to my mummy and MIL! Cos they know that this CL doesn't cook well, they take turns to cook nice food for me. Suddenly I feel so bad to trouble all of them during this confinement...given a choice, I would only want them to come visit me and Baby Garreth and not go through all these stress for us.

I better be grateful.

Mum's The Best

It has been part of a routine to call my mum at the end of the day to "report" to her on my daily activities (if she's busy to pop by my place) and last night was no exception. Was telling her how yucky the food the CL has cooked and the bad sleeping habit baby Garreth has developed for the past 3 days.

This morning, she turned up at my place at 9.30am with piping hot XO tonic soup, black bean pork ribs soup and my favourite black soy sauce chicken with ginger. Dad secretly told me that mum has creeped out of the bed as early as 5.30am to go the market to buy all the raw ingredients and prepared all these food for me cos' she's worried that I'm not getting enough nutritious from the miserable food the CL has cooked for me.

I is so touched that I wanna weep lor. Mum is always the best and she will always be the best. And I know that as long as she's around, I will always be dependent on her when comes to such situations. Having just been "promoted" as a mum myself, I also start to really understand the hardship of motherhood. It will be a long journey as long as Garreth boy is still little, but I strive to be a good mummy just like my own mummy.

We had a visitor yesterday afternoon. It was raining cats and dogs but SY still came all the way to pay us a visit, with 2 bottles of Ribena and 2 cups of my favourite Meiji yogurt. Not sure if it's becos' of her, baby Garreth did manage to catch some afternoon sleep during the most difficult part of the day. We did some catch ups and I did some bitchings about the current CL (I need to vent my pent-up frustrations la!), and SY left in the evening and gave a big angbao for Garreth. Aiyo..felt so bad, already told her to just come with the Ribenas but still she pushed the angbao to us. I hope she will turn up at the Baby Shower next Saturday with her old man, looking forward to take some pictures with them for keepsake...SY, if you're reading this, pls come ok?

Oh gosh...mum's XO herbal soup is sure power...my head is feeling a little light now and I guess I better take a nap before the little rascal wakes up and refuse to sleep thereafter!

3 More Kg to Go!

I braved myself to the weighing scale earlier on and realised that I have already shed 8 kg since birth and I have 3kg more to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight! Woohoo! Way to go!

So far, I could comfortably wear back my favourite pair of culottes and squeeze into my jeans (but a little tight!). I'm still a little fearful of trying on my old tops cos' my "expanded" boobs might not fit! Aye...

Now having headaches planning the upcoming Baby Shower next Sat. Seems like my MIL wants to invite the whole world to the event, the relatives, her good friends, her SOKA buddies, and the list goes on and on. Kaoz..now our guest list stands at 137, wonder if there will be more as the date draws near? Sigh, I so wanna juz bring the baby away and hide over that weekend and let them party at my place. It's gonna be chaos...I hope the house will still be in one piece after the guests are gone...haha...

Time seems to pass so soon with Baby Garreth on board. Everyday's schedule is filled with pumping milk, feeding him milk, patting him to sleep, playing with him, checking if he pee or poo, napping with him...surf the internet for info (baby's development)....my whole world practically just surrounds him now and nothing else!

Realise that I still get quite edgy at times, esp when things don't go according to my way or I don't get enough rest. Usually Hubby Goh will be the victim and get snapped by me, and I feel really bad but I reckon I couldn't control myself cos' the hormones are doing tricks again. Juz wanna say sorry to Hubby Goh, I promise to be conscious of what I say and will try my best to keep cool all the time.

Know what? I long to step out of the house and be free again...counting down the days...but it also means sleepless nights are gonna start soon when the Confinement lady is gone...oh dear oh dear..

Breastfeeding Stress

Have been quite stressed up on breastfeeding these couple of days cos Garreth boy is a high cc to maintain and has been demanding his feeds at every 2 hrs interval. Just 2 days ago, I've decided to latch him on entirely during day and then bottle feed him with either formula or my expressed breastmilk at night, but seems like he has developed the habit of suckling to sleep and has been giving the confinement auntie hell at night, yelling for my breasts. I refused to budge cos' I want him to get adapted to bottles at night as I would not have the luxury of total breastfeed him when I'm back to work. Not sure if what I'm doing is right though...sigh.

Anyway, Hubby Goh has been a great support so far. Seeming me so stressed, he took half day leave yesterday and brought me out to Sitex show to hunt for a cheap LCD TV bargain together. The old 29" Philips in the living room died on us on the 5th day I was discharged from the hospital and the house felt so dead without a TV, especially when visitors start to roll in.

Talk about visitors, there has been no one day where we have peaceful days without visitors. Who were the ones who said post-natal women needs plenty of rest during confinement? Seems like alot of people are not aware or totally bor chup, they just happy happy pop by without calling us in advance or check if it's convenience to visit.

Yes, I'm talking about my MIL the dearest.

Eversince she's back from her Genting trip, she has come almost everyday to visit her grandson. Sometimes alone, sometimes she will bring her relatives or good friends along. Usually she will shoo me to my room to rest, but come on lah, how to sleep when they are all talking and laughing loudly in my living room? And that's not all, she will bring her camera along with her everytime and then start shooting Garreth boy with the flash on although I have told her umpteen times that flash are harmful to newborns' eyes. She will just replied and said that baby is sleeping, his eyes are closed, so no issues. I am so freaking pissed!

I think she has also gave up on me cos' she keeps asking me to rest but I don't, she asks me to eat more but I don't cos' I'm not hungry all the time and the list keeps going on. In fact, I think I have broken more confinement rules than any other gals that my confinement auntie also shook her head, haha. But it's amazing that my mum has been quite supportive so far, besides ice-cream and durians, she also allowed me to go out to take a breather at times. I think our own mums are the best! Haha..

Here's my garreth boy...the little rascal!